Our most effective leaders are amazing listeners. These are the people who listen thoughtfully and carefully. They want to hear our words, our heart values and struggles. Good listening is more than being quiet while the other person talks. Great conversations are interactive. The best listeners ask questions to discover and share insight, aiming for a common understanding.

The best listeners ask questions that promote discovery and insight. Good listening is a cooperative and interactive conversation allowing feedback to flow smoothly in both directions. The best leaders encourage conversations instead of directing. Use what or how questions to get people to open up. Then, ask open-ended questions to help group members answer with more than a simple yes or no. Questions like, what did you learn from the verse or chapter of the book, will bring up more illustrative inquiry. As you listen and interact, watch for nonverbal cues, such as facial expressions, gestures, posture, and other subtle body language signals.  It is estimated that 80% of what we communicate comes from these non-verbal signals. We listen with our eyes as well as our ears.

The focus of a conversation is not just covering the material. It is prayerfully focusing on God’s plan. Pray before, during and after an individual or group meeting.

“The single greatest attribute of an effective leader: (is) the ability to listen. Keep in mind that for most people, listening is about the hardest work they’ll ever do.”  (Brian Billick, Competitive Leadership: Twelve Principles for Success)

We are naturally biased to speak our minds. Ineffective leaders are poor listeners and treat conversations as chances to talk about themselves increasing their perceived status.  They spend more time planning their next response than listening to others.

God invites us to be quiet and listen. “Be still and know that I am God.” (Psalm 46:10 NIV)

“My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry”. (James 1:19 NIV)

Leadership is … listening and caring to build relationships

Yours in Service,

Laurie D. Kennedy
Leadership Coach
ldkjethrogroup@gmail.com

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